I’m not a deep or publicly emotional person. I’m just an “Accidental Mommy” and have always kept that kind of stuff to myself because “emotions are for girly-girls”. It’s not that I don’t have deep emotion, I just generally save it for when my husband most needs some good nagging.
Well, keep your panty hose on, because it’s gonna get a little bit mushy.
(by the way, this is another of those late night posts, and WHAT DID MY DOG EAT? He is killing me.)
My daughter will be 8 months old on July 27th. It is seriously hard to believe the time has gone by so quickly. Every day something about her amazes me. I mean, I made her! (well, Ed was there too I guess…) She has recently started crawling. It started out as the funniest “slither-crawl” with her actually covering some ground but not being able to move her arms and legs together so she would end up on her belly between every move. We encouraged her so much for the few weeks she did that. In hindsight, why did we do that? Now she is at full blown, “I’m getting up and leaving this room and you have to chase me and keep me out of trouble” stage.
On one hand, I do miss those completely dependent on my amusement abilities age where she just looked into my eyes and coo’d (or screamed….yeah, she mostly screamed) but now I do like that she will entertain herself for a bit longer (especially when she finds the vacuum cord…oops) and I simply adore watching her explore.
Mostly her explorations have involved crawling away from me to check out dangerous rooms, touch electrical sockets or get at another toy but yesterday she started doing something new. She started crawling towards me when I was sitting on the floor, putting her hands and my legs and then my arms and trying to stand up. It was like slow motion as she did this and it was so sweet. Of all the things in the room she could have used to try and stand up with, she deliberately chose me. And as she slowly tested each grip and her footing with each step while trying to stand, she just melted my heart. It was like she knew that what she was attempting required Mommy. She needed my support and I swear she hugged me when she finally made it all the way to standing. She’s done it quite a few times since and it still has reduced me to a pile of mushy goo each time.
I don’t remember these kinds of experiences with my son. Maybe it was because I worked full time, maybe it was because time just erases these wonderful memories or maybe I just didn’t pay attention because I was younger and was still planning on having more kids. Not that I didn’t enjoy and appreciate him, but that sentiment took a back seat to survival and now knowing she is #2 of 2, maybe I savor it more. I don’t know why, and I’m a little saddened by it, but a lot of what I have experienced with Abby feels like the first time.
Well that is about the extent of my “deep thoughts” for now. It’s now 4 am and I really should get some sleep.
Abby still wakes me up to eat once each night and what could take about 10 minutes turns into an hour because the internet never sleeps.
This might be a mental disorder.
Choosing blogging over sleep.
Oh well, I like nuts.