Funny fortune cookie quotes

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Who doesn’t love a fortune cookie?

I mean you get a tasty treat and a profound message to go a long with it.

Whether or not you believe in the Chinese tradition of fortunes, it’s fun to pop open a fortune cookie and read what is inside.

Sometimes I get really good fortunes that I put in my wallet and save to see if they come true.  Other times they are really stupid.

But sometimes, fortunes cookies contain messages that are downright funny.

Take a look at some funny fortune cookie quotes:

"your tongue is your ambassador"

Fortune Cookie

greg/our ultimate fortune

The Most Awesome Fortune Cookie Ever!

Lazy Bastard Fortune

Funny fortune cookie

love thy neighbour, just don't get caught

Don't Do Drugs

you look pretty

For tomorrow you may diet

Fortune Cookie

The "digital/analog" fortune cookie

Mean Fortune Cookie

an amazing fortune cookie

Fortune

fortunecookie

Unusual Equipment

Have you ever gotten a funny fortune in a fortune cookie?

About Kimberly Grabinski

Food. Motherhood. Sweat. Advocate for: real food, chemical-free living, raw milk, NSNG (no sugar, no grains) & GMO labeling.

I always read the labels.

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Comments

  1. oops, wrong cookie =)

  2. I’ve gotten the “You look pretty” one before. One of my friend’s got one that said “it tastes sweet”

  3. I got a fortune cookie that said “What is hidden in an empty?”
    um….. nothing? air?
    what kind of fortune is that?

  4. Those are cute! I haven’t had a fortune cookie in forever.
    Bill doesn’t like Chinese food so we don’t go out for it, when I want it I’ll get some of the new frozen dinners for myself and they don’t come with cookies. =(
    I don’t remember any funny ones.
    Thanks for sharing these, they made me smile.

  5. Once long ago I got a fortune cookie message that read:” Help, I’ve been kidnapped in a Chinese cookie factory!” Later I found out that a friend was playing a joke on me! SICK!!!!!

  6. ”What doesn’t kill you, makes you stranger”
    No, that’s not a typo: it really says stranger, not stronger.

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